← Table of ContentsLone Star Planet

CHAPTER IV

The Statehouse appeared to cover about a square mile of ground and it

was an insane jumble of buildings piled beside and on top of one

another, as though it had been in continuous construction ever since the

planet was colonized, eighty-odd years before.

At what looked like one of the main entrances, the car stopped. I told

our Marine driver and auto-rifleman to park the car and take in the

barbecue, but to leave word with the doorman where they could be found.

Hoddy, Thrombley and I then went in, to be met by a couple of New Texas

Rangers, one of them the officer who had called at the Embassy. They

guided us to the office of the Secretary of State.

"We're dreadfully late," Thrombley was fretting. "I do hope we haven't

kept the Secretary waiting too long."

From the looks of him, I was afraid we had. He jumped up from his desk

and hurried across the room as soon as the receptionist opened the door

for us, his hand extended.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Thrombley," he burbled nervously. "And this is the

new Ambassador, I suppose. And this--" He caught sight of Hoddy Ringo,

bringing up the rear and stopped short, hand flying to open mouth. "Oh,

dear me!"

So far, I had been building myself a New Texas stereotype from Hoddy

Ringo and the Ranger officer who had chased us to the Embassy. But this

frightened little rabbit of a fellow simply didn't fit it. An alien

would be justified in assigning him to an entirely different species.

Thrombley introduced me. I introduced Hoddy as my confidential secretary

and advisor. We all shook hands, and Thrombley dug my credentials out of

his briefcase and handed them to me, and I handed them to the Secretary

of State, Mr. William A. Palme. He barely glanced at them, then shook my

hand again fervently and mumbled something about "inexpressible

pleasure" and "entirely acceptable to my government."

That made me the accredited and accepted Ambassador to New Texas.

Mr. Palme hoped, or said he hoped, that my stay in New Texas would be

long and pleasant. He seemed rather less than convinced that it would

be. His eyes kept returning in horrified fascination to my belt. Each

time they would focus on the butts of my Krupp-Tattas, he would pull

them resolutely away again.

"And now, we must take you to President Hutchinson; he is most anxious

to meet you, Mr. Silk. If you will please come with me ..."

Four or five Rangers who had been loitering the hall outside moved to

follow us as we went toward the elevator. Although we had come into the

building onto a floor only a few feet above street-level, we went down

three floors from the hallway outside the Secretary of State's office,

into a huge room, the concrete floor of which was oil-stained, as

though vehicles were continually being driven in and out. It was about a

hundred feet wide, and two or three hundred in length. Daylight was

visible through open doors at the end. As we approached them, the

Rangers fanning out on either side and in front of us, I could hear a

perfect bedlam of noise outside--shouting, singing, dance-band music,

interspersed with the banging of shots.

When we reached the doors at the end, we emerged into one end of a big

rectangular plaza, at least five hundred yards in length. Most of the

uproar was centered at the opposite end, where several thousand people,

in costumes colored through the whole spectrum, were milling about.

There seemed to be at least two square-dances going on, to the music of

competing bands. At the distant end of the plaza, over the heads of the

crowd, I could see the piles and tracks of an overhead crane, towering

above what looked like an open-hearth furnace. Between us and the bulk

of the crowd, in a cleared space, two medium tanks, heavily padded with

mats, were ramming and trying to overturn each other, the mob of

spectators crowding as close to them as they dared. The din was

positively deafening, though we were at least two hundred yards from the

center of the crowd.

"Oh, dear, I always dread these things!" Palme was saying.

"Yes, absolutely anything could happen," Thrombley twittered.

"Man, this is a real barbecue!" Hoddy gloated. "Now I really feel at

home!"

"Over this way, Mr. Silk," Palme said, guiding me toward the short end

of the plaza, on our left. "We will see the President and then ..."

He gulped.

"... then we will all go to the barbecue."

In the center of the short end of the plaza, dwarfed by the monster

bulks of steel and concrete and glass around it, stood a little old

building of warm-tinted adobe. I had never seen it before, but somehow

it was familiar-looking. And then I remembered. Although I had never

seen it before, I had seen it pictured many times; pictured under

attack, with gunsmoke spouting from windows and parapets.

I plucked Thrombley's sleeve.

"Isn't that a replica of the Alamo?"

He was shocked. "Oh, dear, Mr. Ambassador, don't let anybody hear you

ask that. That's no replica. It _is_ the Alamo. _The_ Alamo."

I stood there a moment, looking at it. I was remembering, and finally

understanding, what my psycho-history lessons about the "Romantic

Freeze" had meant.

_They had taken this little mission-fort down, brick by adobe brick,

loaded it carefully into a spaceship, brought it here, forty two

light-years away from Terra, and reverently set it up again. Then they

had built a whole world and a whole social philosophy around it_.

It had been the dissatisfied, of course, the discontented, the dreamers,

who had led the vanguard of man's explosion into space following the

discovery of the hyperspace-drive. They had gone from Terra cherishing

dreams of things that had been dumped into the dust bin of history,

carrying with them pictures of ways of life that had passed away, or

that had never really been. Then, in their new life, on new planets,

they had set to work making those dreams and those pictures live.

And, many times, they had come close to succeeding.

These Texans, now: they had left behind the cold fact that it had been

their state's great industrial complex that had made their migration

possible. They ignored the fact that their life here on Capella IV was

possible only by application of modern industrial technology. That rodeo

down the plaza--tank-tilting instead of bronco-busting. Here they were,

living frozen in a romantic dream, a world of roving cowboys and ranch

kingdoms.

No wonder Hoddy hadn't liked the books I had been reading on the ship.

They shook the fabric of that dream.

There were people moving about, at this relatively quiet end of the

plaza, mostly in the direction of the barbecue. Ten or twelve Rangers

loitered at the front of the Alamo, and with them I saw the dress blues

of my two Marines. There was a little three-wheeled motorcart among

them, from which they were helping themselves to food and drink. When

they saw us coming, the two Marines shoved their sandwiches into the

hands of a couple of Rangers and tried to come to attention.

"At ease, at ease," I told them. "Have a good time, boys. Hoddy, you

better get in on some of this grub; I may be inside for quite a while."

As soon as the Rangers saw Hoddy, they hastily got things out of their

right hands. Hoddy grinned at them.

"Take it easy, boys," he said. "I'm protected by the game laws. I'm a

diplomat, I am."

There were a couple of Rangers lounging outside the door of the

President's office and both of them carried autorifles, implying things

I didn't like.

I had seen the President of the Solar League wandering around the

dome-city of Artemis unattended, looking for all the world like a

professor in his academic halls. Since then, maybe before then, I had

always had a healthy suspicion of governments whose chiefs had to

surround themselves with bodyguards.

But the President of New Texas, John Hutchinson, was alone in his office

when we were shown in. He got up and came around his desk to greet us, a

slender, stoop-shouldered man in a black-and-gold laced jacket. He had a

narrow compressed mouth and eyes that seemed to be watching every corner

of the room at once. He wore a pair of small pistols in cross-body

holsters under his coat, and he always kept one hand or the other close

to his abdomen.

He was like, and yet unlike, the Secretary of State. Both had the look

of hunted animals; but where Palme was a rabbit, twitching to take

flight at the first whiff of danger, Hutchinson was a cat who hears

hounds baying--ready to run if he could, or claw if he must.

"Good day, Mr. Silk," he said, shaking hands with me after the

introductions. "I see you're heeled; you're smart. You wouldn't be here

today if poor Silas Cumshaw'd been as smart as you are. Great man,

though; a wise and farseeing statesman. He and I were real friends."

"You know who Mr. Silk brought with him as bodyguard?" Palme asked.

"Hoddy Ringo!"

"Oh, my God! I thought this planet was rid of him!" The President turned

to me. "You got a good trigger-man, though, Mr. Ambassador. Good man to

watch your back for you. But lot of folks here won't thank you for

bringing him back to New Texas."

He looked at his watch. "We have time for a little drink, before we go

outside, Mr. Silk," he said. "Care to join me?"

I assented and he got a bottle of superbourbon out of his desk, with

four glasses. Palme got some water tumblers and brought the pitcher of

ice-water from the cooler.

I noticed that the New Texas Secretary of State filled his three-ounce

liquor glass to the top and gulped it down at once. He might act as

though he were descended from a long line of maiden aunts, but he took

his liquor in blasts that would have floored a spaceport labor-boss.

We had another drink, a little slower, and chatted for a while, and then

Hutchinson said, regretfully that we'd have to go outside and meet the

folks. Outside, our guards--Hoddy, the two Marines, the Rangers who had

escorted us from Palme's office, and Hutchinson's retinue--surrounded

us, and we made our way down the plaza, through the crowd. The

din--ear-piercing yells, whistles, cowbells, pistol shots, the cacophony

of the two dance-bands, and the chorus-singing, of which I caught only

the words: _The skies of freedom are above you!_--was as bad as New

Year's Eve in Manhattan or Nairobi or New Moscow, on Terra.

"Don't take all this as a personal tribute, Mr. Silk!" Hutchinson

screamed into my ear. "On this planet, to paraphrase Nietzsche, a good

barbecue halloweth any cause!"

That surprised me, at the moment. Later I found out that John Hutchinson

was one of the leading scholars on New Texas and had once been president

of one of their universities. New Texas Christian, I believe.

As we got up onto the platform, close enough to the barbecue pits to

feel the heat from them, somebody let off what sounded like a fifty-mm

anti-tank gun five or six times. Hutchinson grabbed a microphone and

bellowed into it: "Ladies and gentlemen! Your attention, please!"

The noise began to diminish, slowly, until I could hear one voice, in

the crowd below:

"Shut up, you damn fools! We can't eat till this is over!"

Hutchinson introduced me, in very few words. I gathered that lengthy

speeches at barbecues were not popular on New Texas.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" I yelled into the microphone. "Appreciative as I

am of this honor, there is one here who is more deserving of your notice

than I; one to whom I, also, pay homage. He's over there on the fire,

and I want a slice of him as soon as possible!"

That got a big ovation. There was, beside the water pitcher, a bottle of

superbourbon. I ostentatiously threw the water out of the glass, poured

a big shot of the corrosive stuff, and downed it.

"For God's sake, let's eat!" I finished. Then I turned to Thrombley, who

was looking like a priest who has just seen the bishop spit in the

holy-water font. "Stick close to me," I whispered. "Cue me in on the

local notables, and the other members of the Diplomatic Corps." Then we

all got down off the platform, and a band climbed up and began playing

one of those raucous "cowboy ballads" which had originated in Manhattan

about the middle of the Twentieth Century.

"The sandwiches'll be here in a moment, Mr. Ambassador," Hutchinson

screamed--in effect, whispered--in my ear. "Don't feel any reluctance

about shaking hands with a sandwich in your other hand; that's standard

practice, here. You struck just the right note, up there. That business

with the liquor was positively inspired!"

The sandwiches--huge masses of meat and hot relish, wrapped in tortillas

of some sort--arrived and I bit into one.

I'd been eating supercow all my life, frozen or electron-beamed for

transportation, and now I was discovering that I had never really eaten

supercow before. I finished the first sandwich in surprisingly short

order and was starting on my second when the crowd began coming.

First, the Diplomatic Corps, the usual collection of weirdies, human and

otherwise....

There was the Ambassador from Tara, in a suit of what his planet

produced as a substitute for Irish homespuns. His Embassy, if it was

like the others I had seen elsewhere, would be an outsize cottage with

whitewashed walls and a thatched roof, with a bowl of milk outside the

door for the Little People ...

The Ambassador from Alpheratz II, the South African Nationalist planet,

with a full beard, and old fashioned plug hat and tail-coat. They were a

frustrated lot. They had gone into space to practice _apartheid_ and had

settled on a planet where there was no other intelligent race to be

superior to....

The Mormon Ambassador from Deseret--Delta Camelopardalis V....

The Ambassador from Spica VII, a short jolly-looking little fellow, with

a head like a seal's, long arms, short legs and a tail like a

kangaroo's....

The Ambassador from Beta Cephus VI, who could have passed for human if

he hadn't had blood with a copper base instead of iron. His skin was a

dark green and his hair was a bright blue....

I was beginning to correct my first impression that Thrombley was a

complete dithering fool. He stood at my left elbow, whispering the names

and governments and home planets of the Ambassadors as they came up,

handing me little slips of paper on which he had written phonetically

correct renditions of the greetings I would give them in their own

language. I was still twittering a reply to the greeting of

Nanadabadian, from Beta Cephus VI, when he whispered to me:

"Here it comes, sir. The z'Srauff!"

The z'Srauff were reasonably close to human stature and appearance,

allowing for the fact that their ancestry had been canine instead of

simian. They had, of course, longer and narrower jaws than we have, and

definitely carnivorous teeth.

There were stories floating around that they enjoyed barbecued Terran

even better than they did supercow and hot relish.

This one advanced, extending his three-fingered hand.

"I am most happy to make connection with Solar League representative,"

he said. "I am named Gglafrr Ddespttann Vuvuvu."

No wonder Thrombley let him introduce himself. I answered in the Basic

English that was all he'd admit to understanding:

"The name of your great nation has gone before you to me. The stories we

tell to our young of you are at the top of our books. I have hope to

make great pleasure in you and me to be friends."

Gglafrr Vuvuvu's smile wavered a little at the oblique reference to the

couple of trouncings our Space Navy had administered to z'Srauff ships

in the past. "We will be in the same place again times with no number,"

the alien replied. "I have hope for you that time you are in this place

will be long and will put pleasure in your heart."

Then the pressure of the line behind him pushed him on. Cabinet Members;

Senators and Representatives; prominent citizens, mostly Judge

so-and-so, or Colonel this-or-that. It was all a blur, so much so that

it was an instant before I recognized the gleaming golden hair and the

statuesque figure.

"Thank you! I have met the Ambassador." The lovely voice was shaking

with restrained anger.

"Gail!" I exclaimed.

"Your father coming to the barbecue, Gail?" President Hutchinson was

asking.

"He ought to be here any minute. He sent me on ahead from the hotel. He

wants to meet the Ambassador. That's why I joined the line."

"Well, suppose I leave Mr. Silk in your hands for a while," Hutchinson

said. "I ought to circulate around a little."

"Yes. Just leave him in my hands!" she said vindictively.

"What's wrong, Gail?" I wanted to know. "I know, I was supposed to meet

you at the spaceport, but--"

"You made a beautiful fool of me at the spaceport!"

"Look, I can explain everything. My Embassy staff insisted on hurrying

me off--"

Somebody gave a high-pitched whoop directly behind me and emptied the

clip of a pistol. I couldn't even hear what else I said. I couldn't hear

what she said, either, but it was something angry.

"You have to listen to me!" I roared in her ear. "I can explain

everything!"

"Any diplomat can explain anything!" she shouted back.

"Look, Gail, you're hanging an innocent man!" I yelled back at her. "I'm

entitled to a fair trial!"

Somebody on the platform began firing his pistol within inches of the

loud-speakers and it sounded like an H-bomb going off. She grabbed my

wrist and dragged me toward a door under the platform.

"Down here!" she yelled. "And this better be good, Mr. Silk!"

We went down a spiral ramp, lighted by widely-scattered overhead lights.

"Space-attack shelter," she explained. "And look: what goes on in

space-ships is one thing, but it's as much as a girl's reputation is

worth to come down here during a barbecue."

There seemed to be quite few girls at that barbecue who didn't care what

happened to their reputations. We discovered that after looking into a

couple of passageways that branched off the entrance.

"Over this way," Gail said, "Confederate Courts Building. There won't be

anything going on over here, now."

I told her, with as much humorous detail as possible, about how

Thrombley had shanghaied me to the Embassy, and about the chase by the

Rangers. Before I was half through, she was laughing heartily, all

traces of her anger gone. Finally, we came to a stairway, and at the

head of it to a small door.

"It's been four years that I've been away from here," she said. "I think

there's a reading room of the Law Library up here. Let's go in and enjoy

the quiet for a while."

But when we opened the door, there was a Ranger standing inside.

"Come to see a trial, Mr. Silk? Oh, hello, Gail. Just in time; they're

going to prepare for the next trial."

As he spoke, something clicked at the door. Gail looked at me in

consternation.

"Now we're locked in," she said. "We can't get out till the

trial's over."