CHAPTER XVIII

Mr. Petulengro's Device--The Leathern Purse--Consent to Purchase a Horse.

As I returned along the road I met Mr. Petulengro and one of his

companions, who told me that they were bound for the public-house;

whereupon I informed Jasper how I had seen in the stable the horse which

we had admired at the fair. "I shouldn't wonder if you buy that horse

after all, brother," said Mr. Petulengro. With a smile at the absurdity

of such a supposition, I left him and his companion, and betook myself to

the dingle. In the evening I received a visit from Mr. Petulengro, who

forthwith commenced talking about the horse, which he had again seen, the

landlord having shown it to him on learning that he was a friend of mine.

He told me that the horse pleased him more than ever, he having examined

his points with more accuracy than he had an opportunity of doing on the

first occasion, concluding by pressing me to buy him. I begged him to

desist from such foolish importunity, assuring him that I had never so

much money in all my life as would enable me to purchase the horse.

Whilst this discourse was going on, Mr. Petulengro and myself were

standing together in the midst of the dingle. Suddenly he began to move

round me--in a very singular manner, making strange motions with his

hands, and frightful contortions with his features, till I became

alarmed, and asked him whether he had not lost his senses? Whereupon,

ceasing his movements and contortions, he assured me that he had not, but

had merely been seized with a slight dizziness, and then once more

returned to the subject of the horse. Feeling myself very angry, I told

him that if he continued persecuting me in that manner, I should be

obliged to quarrel with him; adding, that I believed his only motive for

asking me to buy the animal was to insult my poverty. "Pretty poverty,"

said he, "with fifty pounds in your pocket; however, I have heard say

that it is always the custom of your rich people to talk of their

poverty, more especially when they wish to avoid laying out money."

Surprised at his saying that I had fifty pounds in my pocket, I asked him

what he meant; whereupon he told me that he was very sure that I had

fifty pounds in my pocket, offering to lay me five shillings to that

effect. "Done!" said I; "I have scarcely more than the fifth part of

what you say." "I know better, brother," said Mr. Petulengro; "if you

only pull out what you have in the pocket of your slop, I am sure you

will have lost your wager." Putting my hand into the pocket, I felt

something which I had never felt there before, and pulling it out,

perceived that it was a clumsy leathern purse, which I found on opening

contained four ten-pound-notes, and several pieces of gold. "Didn't I

tell you so, brother?" said Mr. Petulengro. "Now, in the first place,

please to pay me the five shillings you have lost." "This is only a

foolish piece of pleasantry," said I; "you put it into my pocket whilst

you were moving about me, making faces like a distracted person. Here,

take your purse back." "I?" said Mr. Petulengro, "not I, indeed I don't

think I am such a fool. I have won my wager, so pay me the five

shillings, brother." "Do drop this folly," said I, "and take your

purse;" and I flung it on the ground. "Brother," said Mr. Petulengro,

"you were talking of quarrelling with me just now. I tell you now one

thing, which is, that if you do not take back the purse I will quarrel

with you; and it shall be for good and all. I'll drop your acquaintance,

no longer call you my pal, and not even say sarshan to you when I meet

you by the roadside. Hir mi diblis I never will." I saw by Jasper's

look and tone that he was in earnest, and, as I had really a regard for

the strange being, I scarcely knew what to do. "Now, be persuaded,

brother," said Mr. Petulengro, taking up the purse, and handing it to me;

"be persuaded; put the purse into your pocket, and buy the horse."

"Well," said I, "if I did so, would you acknowledge the horse to be

yours, and receive the money again as soon as I should be able to repay

you?"

"I would, brother, I would," said he; "return me the money as soon as you

please, provided you buy the horse." "What motive have you for wishing

me to buy that horse?" said I. "He's to be sold for fifty pounds," said

Jasper, "and is worth four times that sum; though, like many a splendid

bargain, he is now going a begging; buy him, and I'm confident that, in a

little time, a grand gentleman of your appearance may have anything he

asks for him, and found a fortune by his means. Moreover, brother, I

want to dispose of this fifty pounds in a safe manner. If you don't take

it, I shall fool it away in no time, perhaps at card-playing, for you saw

how I was cheated by those blackguard jockeys the other day--we gyptians

don't know how to take care of money: our best plan when we have got a

handful of guineas is to make buttons with them; but I have plenty of

golden buttons, and don't wish to be troubled with more, so you can do me

no greater favour than vesting the money in this speculation, by which my

mind will be relieved of considerable care and trouble for some time at

least."

Perceiving that I still hesitated, he said, "Perhaps, brother, you think

I did not come honestly by the money: by the honestest manner in the

world, for it is the money I earnt by fighting in the ring: I did not

steal it, brother, nor did I get it by disposing of spavined donkeys, or

glandered ponies--nor is it, brother, the profits of my wife's witchcraft

and dukkerin."

"But," said I, "you had better employ it in your traffic." "I have

plenty of money for my traffic, independent of this capital," said Mr.

Petulengro; "ay, brother, and enough besides to back the husband of my

wife's sister, Sylvester, against Slammocks of the Chong gav for twenty

pounds, which I am thinking of doing."

"But," said I, "after all, the horse may have found another purchaser by

this time." "Not he," said Mr. Petulengro, "there is nobody in this

neighbourhood to purchase a horse like that, unless it be your

lordship--so take the money, brother," and he thrust the purse into my

hand. Allowing myself to be persuaded, I kept possession of the purse.

"Are you satisfied now?" said I. "By no means, brother," said Mr.

Petulengro, "you will please to pay me the five shillings which you lost

to me." "Why," said I, "the fifty pounds which I found in my pocket were

not mine, but put in by yourself." "That's nothing to do with the

matter, brother," said Mr. Petulengro, "I betted you five shillings that

you had fifty pounds in your pocket, which sum you had: I did not say

that they were your own, but merely that you had fifty pounds; you will

therefore pay me, brother, or I shall not consider you an honourable

man." Not wishing to have any dispute about such a matter, I took five

shillings out of my under pocket, and gave them to him. Mr. Petulengro

took the money with great glee, observing--"These five shillings I will

take to the public-house forthwith, and spend in drinking with four of my

brethren, and doing so will give me an opportunity of telling the

landlord that I have found a customer for his horse, and that you are the

man. It will be as well to secure the horse as soon as possible; for

though the dook tells me that the horse is intended for you, I have now

and then found that the dook is, like myself, somewhat given to lying."

He then departed, and I remained alone in the dingle. I thought at first

that I had committed a great piece of folly in consenting to purchase

this horse; I might find no desirable purchaser for him, until the money

in my possession should be totally exhausted, and then I might be

compelled to sell him for half the price I had given for him, or be even

glad to find a person who would receive him at a gift; I should then

remain sans horse, and indebted to Mr. Petulengro. Nevertheless, it was

possible that I might sell the horse very advantageously, and by so doing

obtain a fund sufficient to enable me to execute some grand enterprise or

other. My present way of life afforded no prospect of support, whereas

the purchase of the horse did afford a possibility of bettering my

condition, so, after all, had I not done right in consenting to purchase

the horse? the purchase was to be made with another person's property, it

is true, and I did not exactly like the idea of speculating with another

person's property, but Mr. Petulengro had thrust his money upon me, and

if I lost his money, he could have no one but himself to blame; so I

persuaded myself that I had, upon the whole, done right, and having come

to that persuasion, I soon began to enjoy the idea of finding myself on

horseback again, and figured to myself all kinds of strange adventures

which I should meet with on the roads before the horse and I should part

company.